Amorphous
by Subject Z-41319
Summary: Post Watershed 5x24 and on from there. Rated T for things that may come later. For a better summary look up the definition of amorphous. (R&R PLEASE)
1. Frozen in Time

****AN****

This picks up right after the screen goes black in Watershed 5x24. Beckett and Castle are still at the park and Castle just proposed.

* * *

Time froze

It was one of those moments, a rare one, where she had no idea what to do. Should she smack him, push him, kiss him, or run? To be honest the latter was the most appealing for a brief millisecond. Upon reconsideration she realized that she really had only 3 options. 4 if you included silence. She knew full well that silence in a situation like this would spell the indefinite end. Lanie had it right, she couldn't expect the guy to wait around forever. Yes, no, and not now were her only options. She had no idea which door to choose. When she drove over to the park she was sure that she wanted the job. In her approach to Castle she couldn't help but think of the last time they were on the swings together. When she sat down there were all kinds of thoughts running through her head. This was Castle; her partner for the past four years, and the man who saved her life in more ways than one. This is the same guy who when she is in danger exhausts every possible option to make her safe. This is the guy willing to risk everything just so that she wouldn't be alone while standing on a bomb. She wasn't sure what to say or do. So she used her gut.

"What the hell Rick!" She shrieked although she had no idea where that came from. She was more moved by the sentiment than she sounded. She thought due to her training in interrogation that she would have been better able to choose her words. Seems as though the shock of it all has thrown her off her usual game.

He stayed positioned in the same fashion, but had a troubled look on his face, "Okay then." He said it in a tone just low enough that in Beckett's state of shock she did not hear. He closed the ring box and made his way to leave. He rose to his feet more than a little disappointed, and feeling as though his knees were under added pressure. He turns to walk away when something stopped him.

* * *

****AN** **Sorry to leave it like this. I got a bit stuck and I just need a it of time to think it through. I hope you still liked it though. Please review and let me know. I'll try an post as regularly as possible.


	2. What a Relief

****AN****

Sorry it took so long. I had a family thing and then I got stuck at a crossroads. Well here it is! I hope you enjoy. I'll keep the update period shorter next time.

* * *

His mind went back to the moment on the bridge. Before their lives took a turn, as it often did, in the direction of danger. _Yeah well, things have never been easy between you and me._ _Maybe that's what makes it all worth… _Looking back on that moment he had no idea how he was going to finish that sentence. After all of the things that Tyson threw their way in the days prior. There was only one thing he was absolutely certain of. He had a partner in life. It was in that moment that he was certain that with their change in relationship status that things weren't going to change between them.

He knew that he had to stay. For 4 years he had showed up. In that same 4 years he walked away 3 times. Not a great precedent. That's when another thought struck him. We have been here once before. 4 years ago he thought. He turned to her slowly. Her head was down. Her eyes hyper focused on her lap. Her hands lay there with her fingers interlaced. She was twiddling her thumbs when he spoke.

"I've seen this tree before" he mused. Her head popped up confused. She stared at him wondering what he was talking about. He moved on quickly upon seeing her face. He moved back to the swing slowly as his expanded on his thought. "The day of the Heat Wave release party I was told that I might be offered to write for a certain British agent."

Even now under the circumstances Beckett couldn't help the grin tugging on her right cheek. She found it funny that Castle could be superstitious at a time like this. However the relief did not last long she knew where this was headed.

"I remember" she replied in a very small voice.

"I know you hated having me around at the time. Let's reverse the roles here. What would you have done if I took the offer?"

Beckett sat in the stillness of the moment. She already knew what she would have done. Not even a year after he got that offer he disappeared. The worst part was that she knew exactly where he was ─ and who he was with.

"Remember when you left for the Hamptons?" Her voice betrayed her wobbling confidence.

"Yeah" it was more of a question than a statement.

"Probably a less aggravated version of those events."

"What do you mean…" normally he knew or could sense what she kind of space Kate was in. Right now he has no idea. Eyebrows furrowed he continued, "less aggravated?"

Beckett let out a sigh and the breath that she was holding. There was nothing truly bad about what happened. If anything he would see it as romantic. It was just, after it happened she was disappointed with herself. She let this guy, who she really didn't know that well at the time, break her heart into puzzle-sized pieces. Here she was newly single and for one reason, for one person. Watching that one person walk put the door with someone else. She was mad at herself for letting herself need his presence. She had always been her own support system. Yeah she had other people that she could depend on. She was just careful to remain self-reliant.

She stood up to face him; "After the case when you left I dumped Demming."

Castle was shocked and his jaw dropped ever so slightly. In an odd form of serendipity the gentle breeze was no longer there. Just as the air was no longer in Castle's lungs for the briefest of moments. He leaned forward and rested on his legs.

Beckett was looking directly behind him because she wasn't ready to look at him just yet, "before you left with Gina I was trying to tell you that I had feelings for you."

Castle sat up right and found Beckett's eyes. She was slow to start but she returned the glance. He spoke in a low tone, "now I understand why you were so mad at me." Realization and confidence found their way back into his voice a bit at a time.

There it was again; a grin that she couldn't stop from encroaching. She knew him well enough to know what he was thinking. He won. She had feelings for him first. Although, this proved little if anything. All it proved is that she was ready to act on those feelings first.

"Yeah well I wasn't the only one." She stated so that he couldn't be too smug. She sat back on the swing with her hands on the swing relieved. The seriousness and the tension of the situation had dissipated. It was still there but, it was a blinding presence.


	3. The Plan

****AN****

First off, I wanna thank everyone for reading this story of mine. I know that a lot of people do hiatus fiction. I'm just ecstatic about all the support that mine is getting. I especially wanna thank those people who reviewed my story. Just seeing that people were so invested in it made it all the more fun to write. So to all of you THANK YOU!

Secondly, this is the big one. This is the lead in for the answer for both the questions at the end of season 5. In these next two chapter you will find out if Caskett is engaged. Also if Beckett will stay in New York or take the job. Enjoy!

* * *

Inside she was chuckling. Outwardly her face portrayed little of the relief she was feeling. Lite back and forth; this was their home. The situation finally felt more manageable for her. She looked more closely at Castle. There was something missing. She quickly realized that at some point he had put away the ring. It was no longer resting in one of his fists. It was odd but it made her anxious. It created a desire for her to answer his question. He listened to her and what she wanted and now she was going to listen to him.

She had a plan.

She lightly sighed feigning being emotionally spent. She looked at his sweet face as she spoke, "Given everything that is happened I need a little time." She held up a finger before he could speak. "Meet me at the Kimberly Hotel tomorrow night at 9. I'll have a decision and an answer waiting for you." She was confident, excited, and unafraid.

Castle on the other hand was confused. Why the Hotel Beacon? He understood needing time to figure things through, but the meeting spot is what troubled him. If he was honest with himself it also excited him quite a bit.

He submitted to her terms, "Okay."

Upon uttering the word he extended his hand. Beckett looked at it for a second. Looking him dead in the eye she reached for his hand. They shook on it and this one felt different somehow. Following an extremely long shake (by friendship standards) they got up.

Still looking into each others eyes Beckett said, "See you tomorrow night." What normally would have been a question was now more of a statement mixed with a demand.

Intrigued he responded in kind with, "tomorrow."

She had a lot to do in a little time so he began to walk back to her car. Castle stayed behind for a short while. When Beckett was in her car she began making phone calls and sending out text messages.


	4. The Plan in Motion

It was 8:56 pm and Castle had just arrived at the Hotel Beacon. He paid the cabbie and was standing outside looking at the bright lights at the hotel entrance. Looking around he noticed that the right side of the doorway seemed darker. He eyed the right side noticing that two of the bulbs were out. Were he a more superstitious man he would have thought that a bad omen. He entered anyway. As he walked through the door he was hit by a brush of cool air. Looking around the lobby was surprisingly empty. There weren't many people milling around. Of the people that were none of them were Beckett. Guessing that she was working on a case, or wrapping things up at the precinct he made himself comfortable. He figured that she was going to be running a bit late. He looked at his watch and made a mental note of the time. It was 8:57. Time had been at a near glacial place. He made his way to a chair in the center of the lobby facing the entrance. He had not been there for more than what felt like 5 minuets ─ in reality it was only one. That was when he saw L.T. He is one of the uniforms that is at the prescient. And is sometimes present at scenes Beckett (and by extension himself) are called to. He was dressed in his uniform as usual.

"Hey L.T," he called out while standing. He began to make his way over curious what was going on in the hotel that needed police interruption. He knew he had to meet Beckett but, he couldn't help himself.

L.T. turned to find the voice calling out to him. He spotted Castle in the middle of the lobby. Since he was just supposed to guard the hotel he figured there was no harm in a quick conversation. Especially considering, he had been staked in his patrol car for the past three hours. He was basically a paid look out. The hotel was short staffed and the CEO was friends with one of the higher ups. At least two uniforms were watching the building at all times. One in a car and another one on the inside. L.T. had been on this detail for 6 hours and now it was his turn to watch the inside.

"Hey Castle."

Castle was like a bored schoolgirl that found someone else who likes dolls, "who are you here to arrest?" He paused for only a short second before adding, "And what for?"

"Nothing too crazy. I got a call about a guy who's had one too many and might put up a fight," he put it so nonchalantly that it sounded like this happened every day. Granted it probably did but Castle found it highly improbable that L.T. had deal with it _that _often.

"Mind if I tag along."

"Sure why not."

The two of them walked over to the elevator together. On the way over Castle texted Beckett so that she would know that she wasn't being stood up. After finishing the text he kept the phone in his hand. Not that he was expecting an immediate response. Although he could not help but notice it was 8:59. They stepped in the elevator and Castle checked his phone once again before putting it in his pocket. They two of them rode up to the 20th floor. The soft music from the elevator filled the silence. They got to the 20th floor. L.T. lead them to a stairwell that accessed to the rooftop bar. Castle followed him without question. He was just happy to be on a little mini adventure. Upon arriving at the rooftop bar they found it empty. In fact it was all done up for some event. There were red lit decorative trees, lights hung overhead, and table and chairs set up. Not thinking much of it Castle presumed that it was for a wedding reception. They walked around a bit to make sure that guy wasn't already passed out. On their way out Castle noticed something sitting on the bar. Storm Fall. How someone could leave that behind he had no idea. He was thrown. Had it been any other night, and had the events of the last three days been different, he might have noticed more. "I guess he must be at the indoor lounge."

"Yeah I guess," Castle responded still looking at the book. He wasn't really listening.

They walked back out to the bar and down the stairwell. As they did when they reached the floor earlier. However when they reached the main part of the floor the two walked to another stairwell. It lead to all 20 of the floors. Since they were only walking down 4 flights it was faster than waiting for the elevator. Over, around, down, over, around, down. They made their way to the door that accessed the 18th floor. L.T. passed through the door first and held it for Castle.

The walked down a narrow hallway when they reached another door. It was black and looked like something outside a club. L.T. stood to the side an motioned for Castle to go first. Castle eyed his suspiciously but moved ahead. When he passed through the door it was like being in a club. He was in another narrow hallway that was lined one side by gloss off-set brick tiles. Red lights alternating to bottom shone on them─ making them appear red in color. On the other side, was dark square shelving created a faux wall. On those shelves were votive candles He walked farther into the hall way looking to his right. He noticed that he could see a crowd of people on the other side. His feet started to carry him as if he had been there before. For the life of him he could not remember this place, although it did have that air of familiarity to it. He walked to the end of the hallway and turned right, L.T. behind him every step of the way. It dead ended to the right so he made a quick left and walked father inside. The room suddenly opened up a lot. he took the opportunity to take in the room and those around him. Everyone was dressed as if they were attending an office party. Not that he was planning to be here, but her couldn't help but feel underdressed. He noticed roses were lining certain walls. Behind one of the rose setting was a giant version of the cover of Storm Fall. He looked around the room for other and made two discoveries. One, that there were two other large covers hanging on separate side s of the room; two, that L.T. had disappeared.

"Must've gone to the bar already," Castle muttered to no one in particular.

It suddenly dawned on him why this was so familiar. The Storm Fall release party had been held here 5 years ago. At that moment the room got much quieter. Castle thought that either someone had spotted and recognized him, or it was just the horrible timing of mass human communication. He prayed it was the latter. The room's conversational lull afforded him the chance to hear the background music. It was an instrumental version of one called "Feel Again." Of the band Castle ran a blank. The only reason that Castle knew the song was because, Alexis was doing her laundry to the song on repeat two weeks ago at the loft. Looking around again he spotted Ryan and Jenny, by what seemed to be one side of the bar. He walked over planning to keep it brief. Just a "hey" and then he would be on his way.

"Hey guys," he was genuinely excited to see them and it showed, "what are you doing here? Date night?"

"Hey Castle," Ryan replied. He had his right arm around Jenny's waist and his left hand was holding hers. They were sitting in tall bar chairs, bodies turned in with their knees touching. Ryan was about to open his mouth to speak again when Jenny squeezed his hand really hard. Ryan made a small face but Castle caught it. He was beginning to think something was up.

"Yeah we decided spring for a night on the town," Jenny said with her usual right smile.

"Well that's great!" Castle felt like he was being watched. He did know by whom or why but the feeling was there. He knew it was probably nothing. He wanted to take the chance to ask about Beckett. He looked at his watch quickly to check the time. It was 9:10 and she still hadn't answered his text. He had to wonder if he was being stood up. Trying to eliminate the option he asked, "Was Beckett still at the prescient when you left?"

"Yeah she was finishing up some paperwork until she could get into talk with Gates."

"Thanks. Well you two have a great night," Castle's response was almost automatic. He started to walk away when he heard Ryan's voice calling his attention. So he turned around.

"You look like you could use a drink."

Castle gave him a small silent nod. Ryan was right he could use a drink. He made his way through the crowd of faces that seemed vaguely familiar to bar. The mass of bodies thinned as he got closer. When it came into view he noticed Alexis at the far end with a slender older woman. Immediately he recognized it as his mother. Alexis looked to be studying some book. He walked over just as Martha was ordering a drink.

"All right, give me a hit of the bubbly."

"Make that two," Castle added. He would have ordered scotch but he wanted something different.

"Hey, kiddo, sales must be slippin', " Martha turned around to face her son before adding, " they're only serving the soft stuff."

"Hey, Dad," Alexis said in a friendly but almost dismissive tone.

"Hey, sweetie. So, mother—" Castle started.

"Shh Shh Shh! Not so loud, I'm still hoping to get lucky," Martha was looking around to make sure no one heard.

"What are you doing here," Castle moved over by Alexis, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. "And with my impressionable daughter no less." Castle knew that that cold no be more untrue. He also want ted Alexis to have crazy stories about her life that didn't involve mad men of any kind. At the same time as a father the mere thought of her having these times also frightens him.

"I mentioned that I was going out and Alexis wanted a change of scenery," Martha spoke as if it was nothing. "Uh, Hang on, sweetie, I just got a hit on my grey-dar." She looked closely at none other than Jim Beckett. Castle turned to look at the man who could possibly be the next Chet Palaburn. Hopefully assisting in taking his mother of his hands. Martha grew more excited, "Bingo! No ring. Stand back kids, mama's goin' fishin'. Ha ha ha"

The bartender put both glasses of champagne in front of Castle. He walked over to the space let empty by Martha's absence. He turned to Alexis.

"You know I'm proud of you right? I know I'm the cool dad but I worry about. A lot," Castle was very clear when he spoke. Concern and sincerity shone through with every word.

"I know you are, and I appreciate everything you've done for me," she paused putting down her pen in hand. Looking down for a moment she continued, "The main reason I want to go on this trip is to learn something new. To experience something I haven't before."

Castle felt a presence behind him. It felt wired. It was almost ghostly in nature. He wasn't quite sure what it was but he wanted to tell Alexis one more thing.

"I support that. And I know the feeling."

Castle knew that was especially true because 5 years ago he had said something to that effect to her, in this very bar.

"Mr. Castle," chimed a voice that instantly sent chills up his spine. He turned around and in fact it was none other than Kate Beckett herself. She was dressed in her typical attire for work. A pantsuit paired with a single colored blouse and high heels.

"Yes," He said in a hesitant voice. He was kind of nervous. With a greeting like this he had no idea what was going to happen. Although she had a serious look on her face, there was a bright twinkle in her eyes.

"Sargent Kate Beckett, NYPD, I have a question for you regarding our conversation from yesterday," by the end her smile was as wide as could be. On the other hand Castle was thrown by her change in title. He hoped it men t what he thought it meant. He looked around the room once more. Behind Beckett were: Martha, Lanie, Jim Beckett, Esposito, Ryan, and Jenny. In the corner he recognized Hastings and Paul Whittaker. He sincerely hoped that they were together. He then realized that the room was filled uniformed cops from around the 12th ─ sans their uniforms. They were all looking at the two of them. He could even feel Alexis' eyes on him from behind. He looked back to Kate with a new sense of excitement. They were both smiling at each other with looks so sweet, it would give even a dentist a dozen cavities.

"I would be happy to answer any question you have."

"Could you repeat the question you asked me yesterday"

That was the moment he knew. He knew what was going on and he knew what her answer was going to be. He could not have been happier. Luckily he still had the ring in his pocket. With "Feel Again" playing in the background the world seemed to slow for the second time that night. This time it was so they could share this moment together. He reached into his pocket and slowly made the move to get on one knee in front of her.

His knee touched down he spoke with nothing but joy, and unshed tears in his eyes. "Katherine Houghton Beckett will you marry me?"

She was as emotional as he was when she answered, "Yes!"

The room erupted with cheers. Castle slipped the ring on her finger and held her tight. Their closest friends all came to congratulate them with hug. Everyone was crying and Kate Beckett had pulled another one on Richard Castle. While everyone began to hug each other and mingle within themselves Castle and Beckett were in their own little world. In a move from a teen romance movie; Castle grabbed Beckett spun her around, lifting her feet off the floor, and kissed her. The night continued not long after and the crowd started to wean. Eventually it was just the two of them.

Beckett was looking at Castle while holding his hand. She turned to him and said in sweet voice, "Thanks."

Not really sure what Castle had to ask, "What for?"

Sweet smile still in place and and gorgeous glowing eyes Beckett replied, "For showing up."

"Always"


End file.
